Karma, please?

DATELINE: JULY 2006. You may have noticed the gratuitous 'gag' at the end of my June KR Quick Spin on the Honda Hornet?

FIRST PUBLISHED IN Kiwi Rider Magazine

MODEL

MV Agusta
F4 1000

WORDS & PHOTOGRAPHY

David Cohen

Karmic connection

The MV Agusta F4 1000: Italian sculpture with numberplates.

It was a bit where I started waffling-on about motorcycle karma – and how saying nice things about interesting bikes somehow seemed to result in interesting bikes finding their way into my garage.

Ok, maybe not.

Either way, the last line was a tongue-in-cheek reference to the MV Agusta F4 1000 and Xena: Warrior Princess, suggesting that perhaps, by speaking kindly of both, karma etc etc.

Bugger me if the phone didn't ring.

"Dave?"

"Yo."

"Sarge at Colemans."

"Zuuuppp, Sarge?" (I speak his native tongue.)

"Mate, we've got the MV Agusta demo in the shop. Fancy taking it for a few days and doing your thing?"

"Give me a minute to think about it ... (and I was there before he hung up.)"

Motorcycle Art

A head-turner in any setting.

MV Agusta describes its motorcycles as 'Motorcycle Art', and looking at the F4 it's hard to argue.

It really is a stunning motorcycle. The combination of red (or optional blue) and silver-grey bodywork highlights sweeping, organic curves that seem almost at odds with the stealth-bomber angles and sharp-edged styling currently fashionable among many manufacturers.

To quote the MV press release (verbatim): "A design and technology specimen in constant evolution reaching, with the new F4 1000S, its synthesis in performance and emotional limits.
The star of this new race is the new propeller able to express the domineering 166 horsepower strength.
A strength that permits the F4 1000S to cleave the air, reaching a speed that opens doors to a new legend: that of the most beautiful and fastest motorcycle in the world."

I suspect something may have been lost in translation, but it offers a wonderful glimpse into the Italian psyche and the philosophy behind the designer.

"the most beautiful and fastest motorcycle in the world"

Personally, I was more inclined to describe it as ‘a two-wheeled Ferrari’ in conversation.

The comparison with the four-wheeler isn't much of a stretch. Both are stunning to look at, both are expensive thoroughbreds, and tap-out forever.

How fast is fast?

Red, silver and unmistakably Tamburini.

There will always be someone ready to argue that a (insert current favourite here) is faster, but this is the most potent weapon I’ve ever thrown a leg over.

The Ed is bound for Pukekohe to conduct the serious performance testing. My job is simply for my licence to survive for a few days on public roads.

Day-yam, it's quick.

The tacho runs all the way to 17,000rpm, but you only need the first 5,000 to be travelling alarmingly fast.

Nail it on a motorway on-ramp or an open stretch of road and you're waaay beyond the speed limit before hooking second gear. Then it just keeps revving. And pulling. Smoothly. Relentlessly.

By then I'm too busy watching the road and scenery blur past – while grinning wildly inside my helmet:"Woooohooooo!" "Bloody hell!" ... and a few expletives unsuitable for a family magazine.

At around $39,000 this isn't just a motorcycle for the well-heeled.

It's one for the strong-willed. A fair amount of self-restraint is required to resist the temptation to engage the hyperdrive every time the road opens up. It's so easy.  

It's an intoxicating, exhilarating rush, but as noted, its one that could easily have Mr Plod relieving you of your licence before you've finished first gear - if used injudiciously.

That doesn't mean it can't be enjoyed at sane speeds too.

Around town and out of town

Beautiful, expensive, intoxicating and gloriously willing to rev.

It appreciates the occasional handful to clear its throat every now and then, but it handled Auckland traffic without complaint. 

There was noticeable engine heat filtering into the cockpit while crawling through Newmarket at walking pace, but around town the biggest battle wasn't with the bike — it remained pitched against wheelie-driven temptation.

Out on the open road around the Pahootakawa Coast its manners could only be described as impeccable. Neutral steering, excellent feedback and the sort of confidence that encourages you to carry just a little more corner speed each time.

Firm, focused and much happier once the pace picked up.

The boys at Colemans had wound a bit more preload into the suspension setup in anticipation of my larger proportions. The ride was firm without being uncomfortable.

Ergonomically I'm far too big for the bike to be able to ride it seriously fast anyway.

Riders of average dimensions will find the ergonomics a typical sportsbike crouch. The bars are low, the seat is high, and the riding position is much closer to race bike than road bike.

Once you experience the acceleration and the way it tips into corners, though, it all seems perfectly appropriate.

Karma please

Low bars, high seat and a committed riding position.

When I explained to the Co-pilot how this whole motorcycle karma thing appeared to be unfolding, she smiled.

"They've been trying to get me into a Xena costume for years, darlin."

She just got some new leathers and it looks like karma might even be doing the business there as well!

But for now ...

I must tell Sarge how much I enjoy the way those Super Motard blokes ride!

Cockpit detail and Italian theatre.

Single-sided swingarm Ohlins

Carved for carving-up

Under seat beauty.

A race-bike posture.

Thank you, Karma!